Wednesday, February 22, 2006
“The Bohemians” Ch.13
1.The Angel with the large bosoms and slightly parted lips said: Lo and behold! It is this day that Our Lord has chosen to bestow upon us a Master of Arts.
He, having suffered a terrible hangover has now risen again. His head anointed with the Ale of Thelocalpubsheba, having suffered humiliation at the hands of the gentiles, having made to wear a robe of black and a hood of winered, He ascended the steps of the great hall of the temple the mercenary high-priests called Universitatis Bristoliensis.
2. There the Roman, VicesR'us Chancellorius washed his hands off Him by attaching a label to Him for the whole world to mock at. 'There goes the Master of the Arts', shouted the ignorant graduands as Our Lord walked the path with three other robbers also condemned to receive their degrees with distinctions.
3. The ritual having been completed, Our Lord with His ever-ending mercy did not flinch one bit. He then climbed to the top of Mount Eateriai, where many thousands of years ago King Bartender had justly ruled over, and what the Sumerians refer to as the Eh'emai inarestaurant.
4. He then sat at the head of the table and broke garlic bread. His faithful acquaintances having also chosen to eat Italian accompanied Him at this modest feast. Our Lord then spake: He who does not fear food shall dig in, for it is those who eat without restraint and drink without limits that shall enter My Kingdom. With this He broke another piece of bread, then in His infinite radiant grace, gobbled it all up without even asking courteously if all the others had got their starters.
5. He then raised his cup, which did overflow with wine, said a toast to all assembled and tanked Himself up. That night they all did feast, on spaghetti and lasagna and pasta of all shapes, on chicken and beef, on fish and seafood, and oddly enough for an Italian restaurant, kangaroo! At this moment they did all shake and quiver with fear for they heard a mighty rumble. 'Our Lord hath fury', they said as He let out a large burp. Then the handmaiden arrived with an edict from the roman who officiated what they called a till. Everyone at the table needs to pay up it said, for if the roman at the till is not placated, Our Lord shall unleash the three plagues of Babylon. (Actually two; the third one had been quarantined and subsequently all poultry culled)
6. While the exodus of the Bristolians from Mount Eateriai began, one of them, Benjamin the fastidious, also having been very observant and of very keen hearing, beheld a sign. He heard a voice on the other end of the mobile telephone and obeyed. 'Thou shalt walk for ten more minutes', it said, 'In the direction of the neon sign near that dodgy club. Beyond the desert you shall find a fine pub'.
7. At this point, the Lord having no desire to drink anymore, and in search of a good lay, parted way with the Bohemians.
Comments to “The Bohemians” Ch.13
whats next... a period movie? ;-)
posted by Bala1:45 am, February 22, 2006
Thatz quite a transformation !!!
Best wishes !!!
posted by Anand1:55 am, February 22, 2006
:) What flocking locks the man posesses.. I wonder what ointment he be using!
posted by neha vish3:14 am, February 22, 2006
God, you DO look like Jesus ;-)
posted by thennavan8:46 am, February 22, 2006
anand..is that really u?!?!?!
posted by11:15 am, February 22, 2006
Jesus Fucking Christ!
posted by Nilu12:16 pm, February 22, 2006
Awesome... Good one... may the airhostess in the Jet help you to keep it going..
posted by4:51 pm, February 22, 2006
fabulous piece of imaginative writing. or is this a sci-fi ?
posted by lazygeek12:23 am, February 23, 2006
My greetings & congratulations to the Lord. My prayers too, that some day our paths may cross again, and we be able to swap stories over ale and roast beef. Till then, bon voyage. Expecting the lord to chronicle his maiden conquests (should a pun be intended?) on Indian soil.
posted by RamV12:52 am, February 23, 2006
Well Bala, I don't dig periods myself.
Neha: The Lord is annointed on the head with divinity... He doth not require a liniment! He is pleased that chicks dig His hair... it doth constitute a sex symbol. The reaffirmation is appreciated! You may now go in peace.
Mukund: No... the identity has not yet been conclusively proven... please refer to Prof Fakestudy's thesis.. Google for it!
Aarthi: Refer to reply to Mukund
Nilu: So fucking right!
Anon: Do you work in the airline industry yourself? Or do your work for some seriously spooky organisation... how the heck do you know I'm flying Jet? Who are you?... Speak up dammit!
Lazy: It is the scriptures... how dare you call it fiction... we shall have your head.... 5 bags of gold for the man who brings me Guru Subramanian's head... he has insulted The Lord!
Ram: He he! The Lord knows all... sees all... and yes, He does see a spit roast and bitter.
posted by Anand6:11 am, February 23, 2006
Appadi Podu da raasa.. .illa.. pottutiya? :D
posted by anantha10:49 am, February 23, 2006
Juvenile word play, Anti. Only those followers of The Lord in Madras will get the deeper meaning of your sentence.
posted by Chenthil12:23 pm, February 23, 2006
And this is how Da Vinci code was born . By tweaking the scripture to one's own imagination.
And may I know if the Lord chewed wrigleys after the garlic bread. Atleast Listerine please.
posted by lazygeek12:51 pm, February 23, 2006
yo Dude theres always SOMEONE who know what the F*** ur upto.. Anyway good that u realise that i'm spooky.. do call me... Clue : O2 to O2
posted by12:14 am, February 24, 2006
anand..anon is none other than our common enemy..now u really shud be able to find out!!
posted by11:19 am, February 24, 2006
I have now seen. It is true. There does exist a benevolent bearded man. Somewhere.
Otha! Fucking awesome tale man. ROTFFLMAO (second f intentional)
posted by Ravages4:22 pm, February 24, 2006
Anti: What ya talkingu? Potta?... what does that mean... the terrisim law?
Else, refer Chentil's comment! Thanks for that C! :p
Lazy: No... I think you'd ask someone on the class of Nilu for detailed descriptions of the pleasures of certain odours...!
Anon: So it is you, you twat! I'll email you beofre I leave.. My phone's running out of credit so cannot reply to your texts!
CC: I'm sorry but what's MAO mean?
posted by Anand6:16 pm, February 24, 2006
Great! I ve been an ardent reader of ur archvies till now :p.
Can we expect some posts now? Or, are you busy with film assignments already (if you don't mind my asking)?
MAO - My Ass Off, if that was not a joke!
posted by Zero6:38 pm, February 24, 2006
Chenthil: Obvsly one wouldn't want everyone to get the meaning of the message.
Anand: Nalla irundha seri...
posted by anantha8:27 pm, February 24, 2006
ROTFLMAO is Rolling On The Floor, Laughing My Ass Off
In my case, ROTFFLMAO was rolling on the Fucking floor, laughing my ass off.
posted by Ravages9:25 pm, February 24, 2006
Buddy now that you know its me.. Question to Lord Of Hebrew : Did you get the flat number right??
That all i need to know to conclude the rest..
posted by12:33 am, February 25, 2006
Great picture. Congratulations
posted by WA4:21 pm, February 28, 2006
I hope your mom lets you keep the look.
posted by Prince Roy4:36 pm, March 05, 2006
I am Kartik Kannan at Sulekha.com (www.Sulekha.com), one of the biggest online communities worldwide bringing together millions of Indians in over 100 countries.I had the opportunity to read your latest blog post. I found it really fascinating, and so would anybody at Sulekha. Which brings me to an offer I would like to make to you to substantially increase your blog’s readership and popularity.
By creating a parallel blog on Sulekha Blogs, you can dramatically boost the number of people viewing your posts, commenting on them and connecting with each other. All you need to do is give us your approval (Reply to this mail with a YES) so that we can feed your blog posts via RSS into your customized blog page on Sulekha.
I eagerly look forward to seeing you on Sulekha!
I blog at www.katchucrap.blogspot.com
posted by Kartik Kannan2:44 pm, March 07, 2006
References to “The Bohemians” Ch.13
This work is licensed under aCreative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.5 License.